So try getmyexpense.com. It’s web based and the cost is minimal. You can create reports, upload your accounts from Quickbooks and print it all for your records. Since it’s web based you can enter expenses from anywhere, anytime. I am told by many that they forget to include an expense and have to remember to include it when they arrive back to the office. Web based means you can make updates as you think of them and save time and brain power. You can categorize your expenses by project or client and you can also have your assistant print reports if you are out of the office and expenses are due. You can even have your assistant enter them for you. This works great for Attorneys, Sales Associates, Small Businesses etc.

As a nation I think we are beginning to slowly understand that we need to downsize everything in our lives. Bigger is no longer better. We are beginning to accept and be happy with what we already have. The extras are no longer as necessary as they used to be. Therefore, I am getting calls from people who want to optimize their lives. They want to learn to live with even less. Who better to help than a Professional Organizer.

I have said in the past, “the economic disaster we are in is somewhat of a blessing.” Not because people are losing their jobs and homes of course, but because we are forced to reevaluate our living conditions. We are seeing more clearly what is truly important and removing anything from our lives that is complicated. We are simplifying and we are actually happier.

Not only has my business not been effected, but I have to admit… it seems restaurants are bustling. My friends even agree, Friday nights we are still waiting for a table for an hour. I went to dinner at a very popular restaurant on a Monday evening and the place was booked. To me this coincides with exactly what I am saying. We are realizing what is truly important so we are spending more time with friends and family. Meeting out for dinner and enjoying their company.

So I wouldn’t necessarily consider this an economic disaster. I would call it… an economic enhancement.

I share this woman’s happiness. Recently my husband and I decided to simplify as well. We got rid of cable, sold a car, sold a motorcycle and exchanged it for a less expensive one, we’re selling/donating items we no longer need and we stopped shopping needlessly. We’re also doing what we can to pay off debt so we have less bills to pay. I have to say, it feels pretty good. We have less to worry about, less to clean, less to pay for. It gives you a new sense of freedom and control.

While meeting with a new client yesterday, she mentioned there was something so comforting about the thought of moving into her camper. I have no doubts she could be very happy there. She would have more time with her children, husband and family because she would spend less time managing her home, small business and the mountains of laundry her family has. Downsizing has it’s benefits for sure.

All too often excuses are made that inflict blame on others in the home. Without fail it seems important for my clients to tell me how others have contributed to the clutter in their home. Rarely do they accept their role in it. They also tend to avoid their true problems because the excuses make it easier to mask them. Now, don’t get me wrong, this behavior is completely understandable. The embarrassment and shame that go along with a cluttered home are huge contributors to this behavior. I have been known to make these excuses myself. We have all done it at one time or another.

In order to help my clients move forward and break their bad habits I have created a new set of rules to use while working with them. I feel it will help a lot of you not only with a cluttered home but in all areas of your life. These rules were developed as a means to keep my clients focused on what is REAL and TRUE. They put a stop to the smoke and mirror routines we all play in our lives.

Rule #1
We do not talk about HOW the home got cluttered.

Not talking about how the home got in the condition it is in allows us to work with what we have and what is REAL. It forces us to see things as they are and to stop making attempts to blame others and to justify the bad behavior.

Rule #2
We only work on finding solutions to our problems.

Staying focused on solutions gives us the opportunity to think positively. It gives us permission to move forward and makes change easier to bare. Seeing the solution we can envision what is missing and fill the void.

Rule #3
We only look at how we can change our own behavior.

If our homes are full of clutter, we have played some sort of a role in making it that way. There are no if, ands or buts about it. Therefore, we need to identify our own unhealthy behavior and identify how we can do better. We will only spin our wheels trying to get others to see the error of their ways. So instead set an example for others and create a chain reaction. Everyone stops the defensive behavior and works productively to develop solutions.

Candice is her name. She had her first session a couple of weeks ago and my client couldn’t be happier. I chose Candice because she was very secure about her own needs, she was honest, direct and had a deep seeded desire to help others. I instantly could tell she was able to set boundaries, communicate well and could empathize. These are the kinds of traits you need to have to be a professional organizer. She’s a natural. In addition, she has family members with physical/mental handicaps and is a mom and wife. This means she brings a whole new skill set to the table here at NEAT. Her niche is not yet determined, but she enjoys working with children and those with handicaps.

Oh and I saved the best part for last… she is working at a discounted rate while she is training. This is a great time for anyone who wants to save money to have a professionals help for a LOW LOW price. So please spread the word. If you know someone who has complained about being disorganized or if you have been interested in getting some help, but your budget has been tight, give us a call. Candice is ready and willing to help. She works weekends and weeknights.

One caller had an issue with their niece who constantly asked them for money. They were tired of always saying yes, feeling guilty, and never having money for themselves. Their niece was completely irresponsible with money and continued to ask for money whenever she was in a jam. Suze told the caller “Start saying no out of love, instead of yes out of fear.”

This phrase completely hit me. In so many ways we all have the same issues. We get so overwhelmed because we continue to say yes to everything that is asked of us. It’s almost like we never actually stop and think about what we are saying yes to. The word “yes” just automatically spits out of our mouths. If we didn’t we fear we would look incompetent, unappreciative and as woman we always fear being too bitchy… right?

Yes, it’s true, I have a difficult time saying no at times. It’s easy to give advice on this topic but when it comes time to take action it can be difficult. I do have to say, however, there is one trick that works for me and maybe it will work for you.

Here it is, are you ready?......I choose to say nothing.

I actually learned it Alcoholics Anonymous/ALONON. You are taught that you have choices. And one of those choices can be to do nothing. That’s right, doing nothing is a choice. It doesn’t mean you’re a slacker or avoiding something. You can simply choose to say or do nothing. Isn’t that awesome??? So if someone asks me to do something and I get that weird feeling in my gut. I simply say, “I am not able to give you a yes or no answer right now, can I get back to you?” Then I sit on it for a while. Genius isn’t it?

Recently I had a session with a client who was fed up. She was having a difficult time staying organized and she couldn’t figure out why. I have been working with her for close to 4 months so I have learned a lot about her and her setbacks. I had no doubts that her communication skills at work were causing her home to be disorganized.

Allow me to explain… She admitted she had a difficult time delegating tasks to other subordinates. She took on projects that she was not responsible for and she took all her work home because she was always putting out fires at work. The paper work she brought home would pile up so much that it began to spill into all areas of her home. The master bedroom, the dining room, the guest room and so on. She even admitted that she barely touches the files she brings home because she is just so tired after work.

Here lies the problem. The clutter is almost always a symptom of something bigger and more serious. Therefore as a Professional Organizer it is my job to identify the core problem. It can be tricky. Sometimes we think we know, but then our clients throw us for a loop and we have to start from square one. Sometimes the core problem is so big we can’t begin to know what our clients may be going through. But almost always communication skills are a huge factor when clutter is concerned. And the longer I am in this business the quicker I can pick up on it.

When I do see this as a factor for my clients I immediately recommend a therapist or business coach. Learning to say no, delegate, make decisions, communicate your needs, etc. is crucial. Not only to be effective at work but to keep your home neat and clean and your life sane.

So what I am saying is… believe it or not, the road to an organized home is not always purge, sort, recycle, donate, trash.

Ok, so let me set the stage… the extreme hoarder was a mother of three, divorced or widowed (I can’t recall), with a live-in boyfriend. She owned one home and one condo. Both of them were FULL of stuff. She had an alcohol problem, in the past she had a drug problem. She lost her job as a nurse because she was writing herself prescriptions for drugs. She had an eating disorder and she would hoard food. She had 7 refrigerators full of spoiled food and used coolers to store the food that wouldn’t fit in the refrigerators. Her live-in boyfriend was abusive and claimed he was a recovering alcoholic. The children had no bedrooms to sleep in because the home was stuffed. Two of them slept on the couch, in the living room together.

So you can imagine, this is an extreme case. And not only is their hoarding in the home, there are tons of other issues as well. Addiction appears to be the core of the problem. Dr. Phil barely skimmed the surface of this family’s issues in a one hour show. I was disappointed to say the least. Not that Dr. Phil didn’t solve their problems, of course. But because this family’s problems were just too serious and too big to obtain any sort of understanding or deeper knowledge of the situation.

There was no educational component to this episode.  It was simply a bird’s eye view of what is happening in this particular family’s household. Dr. Phil made no attempt to explain the mental illness and addiction that was very apparent. He didn’t even provide a hotline to call or resources for viewers if they are experiencing similar situations. So this is where my disappointment lies. It means nothing to merely ask a few questions and air a family’s dirty laundry on TV. In my opinion it’s simply degrading, disrespectful and childish. I will step off my soapbox now.

I am sure I have now sparked some sort of urge in all of you to see this episode. You can view it by going to http://drphil.com/shows/show/1080. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

On the road trip up to Maryland to see the film, we talked very little about the film. You see, as Professional Organizers we hear stories all the time about hoarders who can no longer sleep in their beds because the bed is covered with stuff. We hear stories about finding dead animals under piles of clothing and rotten food in refrigerators. We expected the film to give us a full view of the life of a hoarder. Not just some quick snippets of their story and some instant before and after photos. We went to see this film because deep down, I think, we wanted something more than Oprah and Clean Sweep. Ohhh and we got more!

Not only did this film give us a full view of the life of a hoarder, it gave us a full view of the hoarders family and their struggles with the disorder. On the ride back to Richmond we were dumbfounded by the extent of the pain, frustration, anger, resentment, sadness and instability that was brought on this family due to a hoarding disorder. Coming from a family of alcoholics I can very easily relate to the issues this family was having. Then to pick up a camera and document it all, amazed me. How strong this family must be to air their dirty laundry. How selfless they were to let us in on their misery. All so they can teach us what really goes on in the mind of a hoarder and how the mental illness effects the entire family.

After seeing the film the group of us were so motivated and enlightened. I think we were charged by the fact that we know we have a responsibility here. As Professional Organizers we are the ones who should be creating awareness of this disorder in our community. We need to collaborate with medical professionals and city ordinances to create a task force to educate our community. We know this is a HUGE undertaking. We see the amount of work this would take and the number of people we would need to make such an accomplishment occur. But after seeing this film, we just aren’t able to help ourselves. It’s just so fascinating!

I have blogged about this topic before. I have preached about the importance and severity of this issue. But this movie explains it all. I couldn’t ever put it into such context. Go to http://www.mymothersgardenmovie.com and find out where this movie is showing or buy the DVD. See it as soon as you can. Just about everyone I know has a family member suffering from this mental illness. Learn how this family was able to establish “some” peace. Notice I didn’t say “complete” peace. You’ll see how this disorder is way to massive for one family to handle. Not to mention, the disorder is still so new to us. We have a lot to learn and a documentary like this is a very good starting point.

I set up the appointment about three weeks in advance. I didn’t think much about it until the day before. I was having such a crazy week with work… I was dying to cancel. I had so many other things that were more important to do. I was so frustrated that I had to take time out of my day to organize my basement!!!!! The day of my session Cathy came to my door, and she could tell, I was not happy.

I moved into my home in September and everything in the basement had not been touched since the day we moved. It was full of tools, equipment, gardening supplies, paint cans, left over bathroom and kitchen tiles, the dreaded tennis stringer (that has not been used in close to two years), and then some. As Cathy and I walked downstairs I was giving her the rundown. It was so amusing to be explaining my mess. I mean, I am the one usually doing the listening. I caught myself saying things like, “I have no idea what’s in that bin” or “why is this down here?” or “how did we acquire 7 levels?!!!!!” Cathy and I shared many laughs.

Immediately Cathy started explaining the zones that we would break the basement into. She was full of ideas I never thought of. Since it was my basement and my stuff, I had lost the ability to see it any other way. I loved that she was making the decisions and taking charge. Which was a HUGE surprise. My biggest worry having her help me was that I would try to control things. Believe it or not, I can be quite bossy. But ironically, I didn’t want to be bogged down with decisions. I just wanted to get the basement organized. Cathy told me what to do and I did it. When I was done, I asked her to give me another task. It was much less overwhelming.

As we worked together I also realized I didn’t feel any guilt. If I had asked a friend to help me organize my creepy, grimy, bug infested basement, I would have been concerned about them and how they were doing. Because I was paying Cathy and knew she was a professional, I could let her do her thing and I could move forward with my tasks.

After about three hours of work, I was so ready to quit. I begged Cathy to leave my house!!!! She insisted we finish up the final hour. Sluggishly, I did menial tasks so I looked like I was working. And then finally, time was up!

We weren’t able to complete the project, but my basement has been completely transformed. I now have an area for bulk storage, garden tools, and my husband actually has a great area to work on projects and store his tools. It felt good to be productive and see the results.

Then our session was complete… thank God! Cathy left and I crashed.